Yes, I'm Still Me ....
Thursday, November 10th, 2011 01:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
debris4spikeEven if I have been a bit absent in my LJing.
Oh I know you will say you still get SPAMmed with a 366 picture and icons ... but I haven't had time to catch up with a couple of owed answers to memes ... or just a general "me" scribble.
So, here goes ...................
Where do I start ... let's start with a James Squeeeeeeeee ... I got my ticket yesterday for London ... seat #28, so not too bad. I feel it is getting closer. just can't wait! All I need to do now is decide what to wear .... and then pluck up the strength to actually speak when I have my photo(s) ... rather than let JamesFog take over! Honestly, I'm 50!
While in London I'm taking an extra day ... so on the Friday I'm going to "do" at least one Museum ... hopefully 2. I need to find out opening times etc, to get the best use of the day.
There's still no real news on the house - the Council have, apparantly, signed the paperwork, as have the people selling the house, as have the neighbours (yes, it got that complicated in the end) - so now I have to wait for their solicitor to sign, before he sends it to mine - then it should be OK. They recon very soon now. However I moved out of Bude in July, so it's been a long gap.
My clothes are there ... my CDs ... everything. I know I'm not greatly materialistic, but it would be nice to get at some of my stuff again!
I suppose when I get to sign I shall panic that I won't actually like the place after all!
The driving has been getting me down - just under 2 hours each day of drive and walk. Not too bad when I compare with some, but still frustrating - I suppose worse as I know there is property waiting nearby.
Staying at Mum & Dad's has basically been OK - but I do need space. I know that I won't be able to spend much time at my own place as neither are coping brilliantly with their health problems ... but I'm hoping having a bit of "me time" will make life easier to cope with.
Mum feels very sorry for herself - understandable as her sight isn't great and she has muscle problems. But she also won't do things to help - she no longer goes out, other than a weakly shop, or to the Physio ... even though I try to persuade her somewhere most weeks. Her memory is also going a bit, but she won't accept that - gets annoyed with anyone who suggests it. Dad's memory has stabalised with his pills, and am hoping that means the Altzeimhers will have been halted at this point. He is doing well in that he has almost finished his second book, this one on The Revelation ... not bad for someone who will be 87 at the end of the month.
They are great people, and when I look at many of the patients I see at the hospital I hate myself for my thoughts ... but I do feel stifled, from time to time.
Still, not much more than normal - so musn't complain.
I'm trying to be positive ... I read in my Bible Study book, that however negative I feel about my life I have a lot to be thankful for ... God's presence in my life is amazing, and if I had nothing else, that is wonderful in itself.
So I must focus on my Faith .... and my loved ones (here, as well as those who will read this) - not think on the things I feel I miss out on.
Well, I warned you it was a ramble - and one without news, in the end!
Hope all my friends are well
*Group Hugs*
Oh I know you will say you still get SPAMmed with a 366 picture and icons ... but I haven't had time to catch up with a couple of owed answers to memes ... or just a general "me" scribble.
So, here goes ...................
Where do I start ... let's start with a James Squeeeeeeeee ... I got my ticket yesterday for London ... seat #28, so not too bad. I feel it is getting closer. just can't wait! All I need to do now is decide what to wear .... and then pluck up the strength to actually speak when I have my photo(s) ... rather than let JamesFog take over! Honestly, I'm 50!
While in London I'm taking an extra day ... so on the Friday I'm going to "do" at least one Museum ... hopefully 2. I need to find out opening times etc, to get the best use of the day.
There's still no real news on the house - the Council have, apparantly, signed the paperwork, as have the people selling the house, as have the neighbours (yes, it got that complicated in the end) - so now I have to wait for their solicitor to sign, before he sends it to mine - then it should be OK. They recon very soon now. However I moved out of Bude in July, so it's been a long gap.
My clothes are there ... my CDs ... everything. I know I'm not greatly materialistic, but it would be nice to get at some of my stuff again!
I suppose when I get to sign I shall panic that I won't actually like the place after all!
The driving has been getting me down - just under 2 hours each day of drive and walk. Not too bad when I compare with some, but still frustrating - I suppose worse as I know there is property waiting nearby.
Staying at Mum & Dad's has basically been OK - but I do need space. I know that I won't be able to spend much time at my own place as neither are coping brilliantly with their health problems ... but I'm hoping having a bit of "me time" will make life easier to cope with.
Mum feels very sorry for herself - understandable as her sight isn't great and she has muscle problems. But she also won't do things to help - she no longer goes out, other than a weakly shop, or to the Physio ... even though I try to persuade her somewhere most weeks. Her memory is also going a bit, but she won't accept that - gets annoyed with anyone who suggests it. Dad's memory has stabalised with his pills, and am hoping that means the Altzeimhers will have been halted at this point. He is doing well in that he has almost finished his second book, this one on The Revelation ... not bad for someone who will be 87 at the end of the month.
They are great people, and when I look at many of the patients I see at the hospital I hate myself for my thoughts ... but I do feel stifled, from time to time.
Still, not much more than normal - so musn't complain.
I'm trying to be positive ... I read in my Bible Study book, that however negative I feel about my life I have a lot to be thankful for ... God's presence in my life is amazing, and if I had nothing else, that is wonderful in itself.
So I must focus on my Faith .... and my loved ones (here, as well as those who will read this) - not think on the things I feel I miss out on.
Well, I warned you it was a ramble - and one without news, in the end!
Hope all my friends are well
*Group Hugs*
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 01:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:52 pm (UTC)btw - I love that icon!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 01:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 09:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 04:51 pm (UTC)I hope your home issues will resolve shortly. Living in limbo is difficult!
Re: James fog - I know that I practiced saying what I wanted to tell him for weeks ahead of time ;) Unfortunately, he's such a talker that sometimes you don't get a word in edgewise! I'm glad you're going!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:55 pm (UTC)I may try practicing ... but then I get within 5 feet of the man, JamesFog takes over! Silly ... sad ... but true! I shall have to write out 50 times - "I must do better!"
no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 05:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:56 pm (UTC)And, am really beginning to look forward to my break ... James being the main reason, but my museum day is going to be special as well. See you on the Saturday!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 06:23 pm (UTC)My father-in-law just passed his 97th birthday. It's pretty amazing. He does quite well and is very self-sufficient, but he is lonely. He has outlived all of his friends and all the family members in his generation.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:51 pm (UTC)Yes, Mum & Dad are great really - amazing to see some of these people at some of theses ages, isn't it?
no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 11:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-10 11:45 pm (UTC)My brother lived two states away and only came for a visit maybe once a year. I did most of the caretaking of my mom. She didn't drive. There were no buses or others to take her shopping, to the doctor or anything else. I spent my weekends and vacations taking care of her. I had to have a few days a week to myself. I wore myself out. Don't do that to yourself. And don't feel guilty for wanting some time and space either. *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:49 pm (UTC)Yes, I know Nick & Tim should do more ... if only emotionally ... which is important to M&D ... but they don't. They feel sorry for me, and say so - but that doesn't help M&D .... and therefore me!
I know that you would know what I was saying ... probably better than I do!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 09:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:24 pm (UTC)I'm looking forward to having time away ... me time ... can't wait!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 04:33 pm (UTC)Enjoy planning your trip to see JM. And fingers crossed for a speedy 'new home' move.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-11 08:23 pm (UTC)No further news on the house, though!
Yay - James ... can't wait!
no subject
Date: 2011-11-18 05:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-18 10:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-21 05:14 am (UTC)