debris4spike: (Huh? - James)
[personal profile] debris4spike
I have yet again been forwarded a list of quotes from TV and radio shows, that prove there are a lot of "blondes" out there!!

  UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
  Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
  Contestant: Homosexuals.
  Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.
 
  BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
  Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
  Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
  Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
  Contestant: Leicester .
 
  BBC NORFOLK
  Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
  Contestant: I don't know.
  White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
  Contestant: Arm.
  White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
  Contestant: Strong.
  White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
  Contestant: Louis.
  White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
  Contestant: Frank Sinatra?
 
  LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS )
  Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy ?
  Contestant: France .
  Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
  Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
  Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
  Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
  Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
  Contestant: Paris .
 
  THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
  Anne Robinson: - Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: - Prison, or the Conservative Party?
  Contestant: The Conservative Party.
 
  BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )
  DJ Mark: For ?10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
  Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?
 
  UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
  Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?
  Contestant: Goosey?
 
  GWR FM ( Bristol )
  Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
  Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.
 
  RTE RADIO 2FM ( IRELAND )
  Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The...?
  Caller: Mohicans.
 
  PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER )
  Phil: What's 11 squared?
  Contestant: I don't know.
  Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
  Contestant: Is it five?
 
  RICHARD AND JUDY
  Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
  A: Forrest Gump.
 
  RICHARD AND JUDY
  Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
  Contestant: Er. . .
  Leslie: He makes bread . . .
  Contestant: Er . ...
  Leslie: He makes cakes . . .
  Contestant: Kipling Street ?
 
  LINCS FM PHONE-IN
  Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
  Contestant: Barcelona .
  Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
  Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain .
 
  NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
  Question: What is the world's largest continent?
  Contestant: The Pacific
 
  ROCK FM ( PRESTON )
  Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.
  Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
 
  THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
  Steve Le Fevre: What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
  Contestant: Magna Carta?
 
  JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
  O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
  Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth ... ER?ER ...  Three?
    
  CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL )
  Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna ?
  Caller: Japan .
  Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
  Caller: Er .... Mexico ?
 
  PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE )
  Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
  Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.
 
  DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
 
  Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
  Contestant: Holland ?
  Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
  Contestant: Iceland ? Ireland ?
  Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel ?
  Contestant: No.
 
  PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
  Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?
  Contestant: Er. .. .
  Wood: It's got two syllables . . . Kor . . .
  Contestant: Blimey?
  Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . . .
  Contestant: (Silence)
  Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .
  Contestant: Walked?
 
  THE VAULT
  Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
  Contestant: Nostalgia.
 
  LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)
  Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?
  Contestant: Jewish.
  Presenter: That's close enough.
 
  STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
  Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging  character  clad only in a loin cloth did he play?
  Contestant: Jesus
 


Makes you realise that you need to have your brain switched on, before opening your mouth!!

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